I am… having a day. A day when some of my old demons cropped up in my head.

Rather than just lose myself in panic and anxiety, I decided to ask questions.

“Why can’t I transition from one task to the next, especially after hyperfocus?”

“What is causing me to feel intense anxiety just at the thought of starting something different after doing self-care?”

“Am I broken?”

I don’t think I am broken. I researched skills that can help me transition more smoothly from one focused moment to the next.

I simply think I feel sheer panic in the transition. It has been going on for, darn, 13 years now?! It has historically gotten worse until I completely snapped and couldn’t function.

This would involve crying fits before going into a job. Crying fits while there. Excessive panic attacks that I couldn’t control. Nausea. Depressive episodes by the bundle.

This condition was never diagnosed. It doesn’t even appear in the DSM formally. It has a name, though: Executive Function Transition Disorder (EFTD).

I’m not going to say I have it or not. What I do know is that I have had issues transitioning from self-care to responsibilities. I also struggle with hyperfocus, which doesn’t give up. It started after my mom passed and, as a business owner, has become slightly more manageable.

However, today was not a manageable day.

I designed two PDF documents. I felt they would help me transition from one focused task to another. In theory, they should reduce panic.

I want to share the files with you. Whether or not you have EFTD, maybe it will help you, too.

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Each one prints out as a single page. If you can use them, great. If not, they are there to share if you know anyone who needs a boost.

I’m looking forward to trying out this new skill for my toolbox. Sometimes… I just need a hand up to keep going.

And that is okay.