This Degree Is Mine — And I’m Earning Every Step of It
First, let me note how much I love using various abstract and patterned images from Pexels as my feature photo. I’m aware it is outside the context of the post, usually, but it is so relaxing. That is why I blog in the first place, so it fits me.
As for the Grounded & Grateful moment for today? Well, I can explain…
Tenacity Isn’t Loud — It’s Showing Up Again Tomorrow: Falling Behind but Catching Up in Class
It has been a week and a half since that fateful MRI of my brain, the discovery, and the following confirmed diagnosis.
I was feeling a lot of things when Idiopathic Intracranial Hypertension (IIH) was dropped like a bomb in my life.
- My Focus? Frazzled.
- My Attention Span? FUBAR’d into next year.
- My Motivations? Shaken, not stirred.
I intended to only fall one day behind posting my discussion response, the day my PCP called. I fell behind multiple days. I fought hard. Fatigue plagued me. My brain couldn’t comprehend simple concepts. Migraines that lasted days. Photophobia, where my computer monitors felt like death rays to the eyes. Discovering that photophobia and auditory pain seemed to correlate in the worst way.
Slowly, I submitted work past due. I eventually managed to get caught up. On Monday? I only need to participate in my class before it ends.
I returned to equilibrium in class, and I won’t need to extend my accommodations to finish the work on hand.
Grounded & Grateful: Finding Gratitude in the Fog of IIH
I started my Gratitude Jar 2025 on New Year’s Day. I made it 6 months before I couldn’t maintain the rhythm anymore. IIH was the catalyst that broke the pattern completely.
So many emotions are swirling as I have learned more about the neurological condition. I also started learning coping techniques for the pain and various side effects. I learned that dim lighting promotes function. I learned how noise-cancelling headphones can dull high-pitch sounds so my ears don’t tune into Buzz 101 FM, all buzzing all the time.
I’m finding coping techniques for sensations I wasn’t aware of snowballing on my “not feeling well” sensations previously. So, awareness does come with benefits. I am learning. I am coping and finding some good moments between bursts of pain.
Being armed with information is good, as I can strategize once I have that awareness.
It feels like it has taken over my world, a simple initialism turned into a monster that became all-consuming
💡Did You Know? An initialism is when you take the first letters of a word, like IIH for Idiopathic Intracranial Hypertension, and they are pronounced letter-by-letter. An acronym is when you do the same, but they become a pronounceable word, like NASA.
Grounded & Grateful: Now I’m Returning to a Daily Gratitude Mindset
Finding gratitude in each day has always helped me maintain better mental health. When I would quit, it brought back some of the darker effects of depression.
I need to be grateful for what exists in my world, or else my world will feel too dark. Starting with something that I feel secure in, like my tenacity, is an easy way to start recognizing the real in my world.
That is what I am most grateful for right now, too. I managed to fall behind and pick myself up. I fell behind for Week 4 of class, but rather than ask for an extension, I am back. I do not need accommodations beyond my allotted time.
I feel proud of myself for this. I’m battling many things, yet I keep showing up. I might look like some sort of computing diva with sunglasses. I may look like a vampire in a dark room with a black screen filter across all the pages I view. I’m showing up anyway.
Just as I plan to start showing up with a grateful mindset once again.
Final Thoughts
If you’re feeling a little “me too” after reading all that, would you mind hitting that like button and sharing my words with someone who needs a little gratitude in their day? Every like and share helps me reach more beautifully complex souls out there who are just trying to stay grounded, too.
I’d love to hear if my perspective on gratitude resonated with you! Use the clunky box below and tell me all about it.
Are you grateful today, too?
Special Thanks
Thank you for holding space with me while I shared my achievements today. Your time here means a lot to me. I process my chaos and celebrate my successes, but it wouldn’t mean nearly as much without you showing up in support.
From one beautifully complex soul to another: Thank you for walking with me down this road I call life. Keep showing up, and keep moving ahead. We’ve got this!
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