Sometimes I feel a little like this swirl of stained glass. It has also been a long day, a couple of days, and 40 years.

Let me explain.

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Diagnostic Mode

This morning I had my brain MRI. I believe we can safely assume I have a brain. All kidding aside, we were just making sure my weakness in my hands, recent influx of shakiness, etc., are not related.

You know, rule out aneurysms and such.

I don’t have results yet, but I’m not worried.

My neck xray had shown the onset of degeneration and facet arthritis the other week. I have a neck MRI on August 2nd to check for pinched nerves.

This is where I stand diagnostically.

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Tire Pressure & Tension

To say the pain has been real the last couple of days would be an understatement. I’ve felt foggy and unfocused. I still function, but I feel like I am functioning around 80%.

Earlier, it felt like I had a giant rock pressing into my back while I sat. I’ve been having muscle spasms sound off across my body in protest.

This stuff hurts. For real.

Then there are the people who just don’t understand the depth of the pain. It isn’t, “I’m just living in pain.”

I have days where I am surprised I dragged myself out of bed (mostly because I need movement so I do not completely lock up). Sitting too long? Locked. Lay down too long? Locked. Stand too long? Pain and gradual weakness as my right leg throws in the towel.

I had a form of steroid epidural in the L5-S1 region on Friday. I am not feeling the feel-good effects of the steroid. My right leg is especially angry with the world.

I am learning to accomplish things a little more slowly and with intention.

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Upgrades & Mods

I bought a cane. If you have ever tried to travel solo in a sedan with a walker, you understand. A cane doesn’t offer seating like a Rollator. It offers portability when I know I will reach a chair semi-quickly. It also offers a little support with each step on my right side.

I wouldn’t have any support if I relied on lower pain levels to travel with Chuck.

I now have a pillow for sleep that is shaped to support the neck.

I bought an under-desk foot rest, as well. It is great for propping up my feet to help with blood flow in my legs. I see a vein specialist next month to deal with that.

I even bought a neck travel pillow. You see, I unintentionally crane my darn neck while crocheting. I wanted it to support my neck so I am not hurting myself while working on a project.

I tried using it today, and it helped. It forced me to look down without shifting my neck into awful positions that hurt. I liked that.

Maybe a tool for your fiber arsenal?

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I’ve been working on things professionally, pain allowing. I’ve also been plowing through school as best I can. It is quite the juggling act, I will say that.

I hope all is well with you, lovely reader. Keep plowing ahead, too. We got this!